My Lost Toddlerhood

The following are meticulous records of my Sunday school activity, taken from my 1981 diary (1 February – 1 November 1981). All entries are (mostly) verbatim. In order to retain anonymity, I have changed the names of my family members and I am writing under a pseudonym. For clarity, Eve is my twin. Mrs. Lackie is the church warden who oversees the Sunday school classes. Delia and Anita are other Sunday school teachers.   I’m 15 when I begin my teaching. Unless otherwise stated, every day is Sunday. Or Read how my Sunday school teaching reveals my horrific toddlerhood The Double Life of a Sunday School Teacher The diary entries illustrate my physical and psychological niggles about doing Sunday school teaching, explained in another article . My Sunday School Records: Winter Period 1 Feb 1981 Wore blue cords, T shirt and a jumper. Mum gone to church. When she had come back, she told me she had fixed for me to be a Sunday school teacher at the parish hall. Sat outside on the sw...

Between 15 February and 1 November 1981, Mum arranged me to be a Sunday school teacher. She probably did so because I didn’t socialize much. I now know I was different because my toddlerhood had been brutalized by an uncle who lived with us for over a year in 1968. I was 3 and my adult self was completely oblivious to this fact until I was 51 .   Becoming a Sunday School Teacher at Fifteen During my Sunday School teaching, I had no conscious awareness of my vile toddlerhood but I kept a diary of a life that did not seem extraordinary on face value. On 1 Feb 1981, Mum arranges me to be a Sunday school teacher The Persona I Adopted: A Separate Identity So I begin Sunday school teaching when I am 15 in 1981. I never enjoy it, but I am successful (the church warden, Mrs. Lackie said she couldn’t do without me).   However, I am mortified to find hidden clues to my difficult toddlerhood in how I behaved whilst I was Sunday school teaching.   Firstly, I am by nature a tombo...